230411 mango in the sun

 April 11, 2023 

I don't know if I have seen a white squill, before. They range from violet to this blue. I have a small patch of them, wild-grown. There is not much in my garden that I put there on purpose. It is open to whatever wants to grow, for the most part. My cousin and I, who share an interest in wildflowers, have noticed two distinct species of this flower, but I could only find the scilla siberica, also called squill, listed in North American flower websites. And yet the very similar creature pictured below is common hereabouts, but its faces look upwards revealing its white centre, whereas the scilla siberica hangs downwards like an umbrella. I found the upwards facing one on a British wildflower site: it is called scilla verna, or spring squill and is indeed a different thing. So my cousin and I are not crazy! Since both of these species are "invasive" it is not too surprising that they are not a standard listing among the wildflowers of Canada. These invaders - they did not set off in ships all by themselves to invade and conquer a new land. They were brought here by humans. I think that we need a new name for invasive species. It is a bit like the "hit by a car" that one sees in the news. Hit by a human, driving a car, is more specific. Just so, these flowers are not the active invaders, but brought through no will of their own, to make their way in a new environment. One cannot fault them for their successful adaptation to their new world. 

Here is the British reference. From a few yards away the two plants look quite similar and one might not notice that they are not the same. 

I have one or two faithful daffodils. This will be the garden's first year without a big tree, so it may become a less lonely place for flora.

*****

This week is the anniversary of my mother-in-law Cameron's death. It was three years ago at the beginning of the pandemic - we had a virtual funeral. It was a strange time, and still is, to me. It seems that the world is trying to go back to business as usual, but I knew then that there would be no return to an old world, but rather a new normal would manifest itself; we should not try to fight it. We need new behaviors, and new health care and better governance to face the years ahead. Not only for covid, which, whether we like it or not, must be addressed as an ongoing health isssue for the foreseeable future, but also for other issues that have come to the surface. With covid, we have large numbers of long covid sufferers and more are added each day. This virus seems to attack random parts of the body, sometimes with long-lasting symptoms. We must all take care to prevent illness, and we have to take care of those whose health is already compromised. 

Into the mix comes war, and climate change, and strife across the planet. I fear also the degeneration of democracy at home and abroad. I ask myself again, is this the way of the old generation? - to see the world in shambles, broken and struggling, at a time in our lives when we ourselves are tired and have not the energy to see a way through? The elders at the time of the Black Plague, or the World Wars, did they feel this way? 

*****

It is food preparation day. I find myself in the kitchen, emptying the fridge of vegetables and fruit. I chop and peel and slice. We will eat for two or three days with what I have prepared today. Vegetables: spinach, peppers, onions, kale, potatoes, prepared for salads, and mangoes and bananas. I bought some plantains but they not ripe yet. They are ready to eat when almost completely black, unlike bananas, which I, at least, prefer just this side of ripe. I thought I might have the energy to cook beans but will have to make do with canned.

I am making some more mango peel chutney, since the last batch was gone in a day or two. The instructions in the original recipe (wellnessmunch.com) which I adapted, says to leave the marinating peel in the sun. I decided, since the sun was shining, to do that. We will see if it makes a difference. For this batch I am using half honey and half maple syrup - neither of which is in the original ingredients, but you use what you have.

*****

It is Tuesday now and very warm. I have seen hyacinth budding, tiny irises in flower, even some of the first smaller violets that blossom early. (There is a larger version that seems identical, except it is three to four inches tall instead of two inches, and it blossoms almost a month later.) We leap from winter to summer in Toronto. I seldom wear a spring coat. It is straight from full-length winter coat to coatless, and that is on this one April day! Certainly we will be in and out of frozen for another few weeks. 

I was disheartened as I walked in the springlike morning, that I did not feel more uplifted; I missed the passion, and its absence was striking and painful. "A little less returned for him each spring. Music began to fail him." More than forty years since I read, and first loved, this poem; now, after all this time, I get it. Sigh. Words of wisdom are wasted on the young. They do not hear it. I did not hear it, how could they? They are shrouded in the ability and the sense of limitless future that is youth. 

We are planning to go east again in a few weeks. I expect this will be our last summer in Quebec. I think that we have to settle somewhere; "Cease this nomadic life.", as my friend GM said to me! We were spoiled for two years, staying in the Estrie, pretending that the dream would never end. But I digress. Now that the change looms, I am struck with urgencies - things that should be put in place before we go, things that must be done in Toronto. I should try to be calm, and to trust that I will rise to the challenges and manage to get through it all before we go. What is most important will get done, I guess that is the stoical way to see it. Being mindful, (just in the normal way,  but interesting), making good use of each moment and hour, will accomplish much. But that is the catch, I am not at my best! How does one conjure up the spirit to do something? I love the magical terminology that this thought draws out! It is indeed some magic spark.

*****

Ducks stop at the ponds in the hydro fields each year. Many will settle just north of here, at the Mimico Creek, although lots of mallards seem to stay the winter there. It is quite sheltered along the creek banks. Perhaps these two will need to go farther north. 

Indeed, the next day these two had gone a couple of hundred yards, to this smaller pond! Not in a hurry, then... Well, I like to think it is the same pair.

On the subject of birds, here is a photo of my first vulture of the year, on April 4. Two other times are noted in my calendar, April 2 and 7, so, right on time. In southern Quebec, last year, the first I saw was on March 9, much earlier. 

A rather nice sunset, an almost full moon, and a blue sky, unbroken by a single cloud, for two days. Things are easier with the warmer weather. I will get through this. 

A note on the chutney. It is very spicy. I will have to make an adjustment to the quantity of chili pepper. It tasted amazing on avocado, excellent contrast in texture and sharpness. 

Thank you for visiting. Take away what vibrates with your thoughts and don't fret about what doesn't. We are each on our own path. 

Mumma Yaga