201018 Covid-19 Day 222 Still Here

Robin, Indre, Fig and I went to the creek yesterday: The children were not in the least concerned about the cold - a serious wade was on the agenda. Wilderness in the middle of the city. 

   

  

 "As the Coronavirus Surges, a New Culprit Emerges: Pandemic Fatigue

Exhaustion and impatience are creating new risks as cases soar in parts of the world. “They have had enough,” one U.S. mayor said of her residents. "*

* https://www.nytimes.com/2020/10/17/us/coronavirus-pandemic-fatigue.html?referringSource=articleShare

  Oct. 18 

   This is the scare: people are tired of the pandemic. It was the latest rage but we've had enough and want to go back to normal. It is feared that people will just be more reckless and fatalistic and the pandemic will swing wildly out of control. We are burnt out, and just tired of it all, tired and broke and needing a drink in a bar just to feel like the before. People are lonely, lost, scared - we all are, to a lesser or greater extent. It is hard on our brains to live in constant uncertainty, feeling out of control.  But there is no going back. This is the normal. Masks, antiseptics, sanitizers, stop with the parties. It's a PANDEMIC - a globally present threat closest in comparison to the Second World War in its universality and danger. 

 

   The children who are living through the 2020 Pandemic are a new generation - they will not (get used to it) go through the developmental stages in the same way as before, the social/physical awareness that used to come with the kindergarten years, nor the adolescent years, social/sexual development. That's okay. The children of the Plague years in the fourteenth century and the children of World War II didn't either, but great change happened, economically and socially, mostly good. Take a deep breath (metaphorically speaking) and perhaps a day off, decide to accept what you can't control and take responsibility for what you can. Begin putting together new solutions to problems you are facing. Distancing while socializing satisfies to a good degree our need to be with others. It is not too cold for a walk or even a park date. I was impressed to see three teens sitting in a circle at the park, with blankets, each her own bottle of water or juice, playing some music and talking just as if they were in their parents' rec room at home. Physical contact is so crucial for children, teenagers, well, everyone. Hug the ones you're with (to paraphrase the song) and make extra time for face-to-face screen contact, increase other physical stimuli, exercise, a hot bath, comforting food and drink, hot chocolate or cider. If you are the parent of a teenager or young adult, consider including their significant other in your household, if the relationship is committed and appropriate. Grandparents and other relatives and close friends can be invited in too, if their lives and yours will accommodate it. 

   We need to scrape the barrel of self-help too. Keep a plague journal - the challenges and your solutions. Write down the worst part of your day - how bad was it? Write down your blessings. It sounds corny and woefully inadequate but it will get easier and does improve your outlook. Do turn to professional help for mental health if you are suffering. Importantly, choose your influences carefully: consider that your friends and colleagues actual and virtual (social media) are affecting your mood, are they positive, like-minded, and supportive? Or are they full of complaint and pessimism, adding to your stress and fueling your frustrations? I only just started using Facebook this spring to reach out and it is so encouraging to find old friends and new who share my interests and philosophy. I am relearning the art of phone conversations - making contact with friends that I didn't seem to have time to keep in touch with before covid-19 and they are welcoming and kind. Our neighbours on the street have been generous with their friendship and support; we exchange hellos and how are yous daily. 

   I retrieved part of an April post about "covid groups" now often referred to as bubbles. It seemed a useful reminder of the early covid days and the seriousness with which we were dealing with the situation. Our home continues to adhere to many of these protocols although we now forego quarantining deliveries and groceries. I first addressed the possibility of adding a person to one's covid group here and thought it might bear review. Each household can determine its needs, protocols and boundaries. We are making it up as we go along. 

Excerpt from Post 200423

"a covid group (def.): the people of a household who share the common spaces and meals and social interaction in a physical unit such as a house. the group is protected by the protocols it demands and the mutual agreement and compliance to these. in our household group of 6, or 7, with the dog, we accept the demands of the most conservative of us. the dog is worried: he follows me around because everything is different, but he doesn't do human protocols. it is k who is the most conservative in this matter, so: deliveries and pick-ups are quarantined for 3 days. hands, doorknobs, the car doors, even the dog leash, are cleaned often. the fewer members going out in the world the better, so those with jobs outside the home will have priority and one of these only should be assigned to errands. we no longer have anyone working outside the home so we have assigned one gofer, to go on all errands.

  i have thought about the possibility of wanting or needing a person to move in, and therefore into the covid group but a person coming to our house would have to self-isolate and we would also need to run checks to protect the incoming person. they would have to agree not to leave the house except for walks and exercise and to abide by the rules of the most conservative etc.

  and i wonder - is this what parents are doing for their unmarried-but-in-a-serious-relationship adult children - "moving their partner in"? i think it's what i'd do. or if i was the adult child i would push for it. but if they want to go out to work: no. that's possibly bringing home captain covid every day. it doubles the risk of contamination. and you might know a senior or a friend who, while coming at extra risk, might benefit from the larger social circle and the laid-on meals and care.

i have become the gofer or "scout" of our covid group. this role evolved because i was the last one in the house going out daily to a sort of job. i was attending my mother-in-law who lived in a seniors' residence."

Last night's "goodnight sky". Keep safe. Comments and questions are welcome. Please take away what suits you and leave behind what doesn't fit. 

Mumma Yaga